Expressing things out loud is kind of a messy thing for me. Whenever I try my words just sort of fall out of my mouth into an incoherent heap of…. words.
When expressing something important it makes it hard. People who are close to me can interpret my odd use of language but trying to communicate with normal humans is like trying to interpret another language.
I don’t really get it.
Although I guess this wouldn’t matter much to you… However… Writing is different. While writing I make the rules.
I am in charge of my writing and what it means. It may still use odd language to communicate basic concepts, and to be honest, if I am writing it I know it will.
When I am writing… I can be anonymous. People can listen to my voice in the words that I use rather than by what I speak. People will know me through my words rather than the mess of a person who exists beyond the screen.
I am in control of what you know about me, and I think I need that right now. I need something… An outlet of sorts… To express all this confusion that is plaguing my mind. I need to be able to express my not so popular views unfiltered…. For once in my life.
I need to figure out what those views are.
I need to figure out who I am and what I believe. Once and for all.
I need to learn to trust myself, and be who I was created to be.
I need to stop thinking of myself in such a negative way.
I guess I need to do a lot of things. But I hope this blog can be an anonymous, yet non-judgemental place to help me get there. Wherever there may be…
I suppose this blog is here now, for me to have a place to get my mess off my chest. Not exactly tell my story. Maybe a bit, but in a very discreet way. I just need a place to be… not me.
So… I invite you to join me on this quest, although from what I understand about life, he journey to healing is quite long. And I don’t even know where I want to end up… Just bear with me and I am sure it will be figured out eventually.
Thank you for reading this awkward blog post, my dear new friends. Prepare for a lot of weird, messy posts ahead!
-Violet Knight Owl (An Alias… Obvi)
Violet Knight Owl 